New normal

It has been a little over a week since my last blog entry.

Since then.. I have been a little better since losing Auntie. I am getting back into a routine and trying to keep pushing forward from this. It has been hard but it's doable.. or I guess has to be because what choice do I really have?

None.

A few updates:

Brooke is loving school. (I think) I see so much of Brooke in me. I feel as though I was her as a child. I know how she feels and I have an idea of what she is thinking but I wish I could somehow get her feelings out of her. Who am I to say that right? I am 28 years old and it has taking me this long to deal with my own feelings and emotions.. I hope she knows everything she feels is okay.

Charlie is doing great. We have PT and OT once a week. I am so ready for her to potty train! She has adjusted to her alone time when B is at school just fine. She is excited for next year when she gets to go to school.
We are thinking of casting her right knee again to see if we can get any more ROM (range of motion) in it. She has finally agreed to this. She misses her wheels she's said.

Danny recently got pre-approved for a mortgage. We have been house hunting the past week. It's been fun, nerve racking, and a little stressful with the girls but we are so grateful and excited for a future here in Florida. If we haven't told you yet, we will be staying! Nothing feels more right.

My blog has always been my random thoughts and always will be. I am sure I have mentioned this in the past. But I've been feeling the urge to speak/write what is on my mind lately so here I am.


Love Always,
Kristin

One Month Down

I've been waiting to write this when it was "the right time" or when it got "easier" to but then I realized, this will never get any easier..

My Auntie is one of the greatest people I know. She shared with me her love for friends, relationships, animals, a good book, the ocean, cooking, picture taking, memory making, scrap booking, and a million other things that mattered. She loved to feel.

I always felt like her daughter. We look alike! We've gone through LOTS of the same things. We each have a high school sweetheart named Danny, we both had a form of Lymphoma 💚💜 we've been bald & gone through chemo around the same age. We have similarities.. We have always wanted a farm. We LOVE the ocean more than words. 🌊 Lance Bass is our favorite Nsync member. Quotes and sayings are life. Music is good for the soul. We always believed you're only as happy as you let yourself be. And only you are in charge of that happiness.

There are a few things I can no longer do without losing it completely. I can't listen to the song 'Senorita' by Shawn Mendes or 'Shallow' by Lady Gaga let alone watch the movie A Star Is Born. 'Fill Me In' by Craig David (that was our song) still stops my breath but is becoming more tolerable.

The happy things.. Charlie has your middle name and initials CJ! ❤ The movie "Shag" brings a smile to my face. Whenever I am at the beach, I think of you. That monarch butterfly is always you 🦋 I hope she knows how much I love her! I will forever cherish the memories I was so lucky to make with her. She will always be in my heart. And for the rest of my life I will search for moments of you.

The regrets I have are small and will leave with time.. The last picture I took on my phone was supposed to go to her but never got sent. I had the feeling to call that weekend, but forgot and didn't. I recently watched A Star Is Born, one of her favs, but never got to talk to her about it.

I think the message being, if you think of someone or miss them.. send the text, make the call, the email, the snap, the dm. Tell them. Because life is TOO short! ❤

Please zoom in to read & please share her freaking awesome obituary she wrote. YOU'RE MY HERO! 💚