Danny and I are getting married in 18 days!

Passion

I've been lacking passion in my life lately. I am not sure how I came to this and how I have just barley realized because as long as I know I have been feeling this way for quite sometime now. It's a weird feeling. It's an empty feeling. I am very happy with everything in my life now. I feel like I am putting most of my emotions and feelings into things that I don't really care to. Putting these great emotions into nothing has finally got old. I finally feel as though I have found something that I am passionate about. Now this thing I have always thought about and have wanted to put my effort and self control into but I have always been to weak and have let my body win my mind. 

If you know me you know that I am the biggest animal lover. There is just something about every animal that makes me so happy. They are so selfless and forgiving. I believe their one and only goal in life is to be our companions, our best friend, the ones who understand us, the ones that make us happy. We come home to them after a long day and no matter our vibe towards them or how long we left them home alone, they are so happy to see us. I could be having the worst day, but as soon as I walk through that door and I am greeted by them, I can't help but smile and be happy. I only hope that I can make them feel the way they make me feel everyday. This is something I wish I could do for every animal. Sadly, I can't. It's not realistic. 

This is where my title comes back into play, passion. I've found it. Every time I think about my new passion I feel reborn, like I am starting a new life. I feel relief and satisfaction. For 22 years I have been doing the same things, this is a huge step that I have been wanting to take for awhile now. I have tried in the past to change this life style of mine but every time in the past I have given up. I was too weak. This time feels right. I'm ready.

It's only been 3 days but so far since March 20th 2013 I have been truly happy with my new life style and giving up meat. I am sure most of you think that I am crazy but this has nothing to do with you. This is something I have always been passionate about. I've always felt somewhat guilty finding pleasure in eating such a valuable life. I understand reasons for both eating and not eating animals. My main issue is how those animals are treated all their life up until their death. They are cheated life. They will never have a life and be treated fairly and they way they deserve to be. I am done feeling guilty and I am done supporting animal cruelty. 

I feel as though a weight has been lifted off my shoulder. I can breathe. I have so much energy to put into this. It feels great to be feeling so passionate about something I care so deeply for. I am excited to experience this new way of living. I am excited to find different ways of consuming protein and making my body so much healthier. It's exciting to learn more about vegetarian life and beliefs. It feels good to believe.

New Me

It might be that time again.. Time that I start blogging. I don't have much to say today but hopefully I can start getting back into putting my thoughts here. I remember being a lot more content with myself in the past leaving all my negativity here.

Update:

Danny and I bought our first car together. A 2012 Nissan Altima, it's BEAUTIFUL! It's a big step for us. We both had two door cars so we wanted a family car for our future.

I will be getting another scan within a month or two. This is something I don't like to think about. I am just going to deal with it when the time comes. Lots of positive thinking for now.

I would really love to start crafting. Reading more. Having more me time.
I am going to focus more on this.

I've been thinking a lot about school. Hopefully sometime in the near future I will buck up and get back into it. But for now, I am happy and content with where I am. I love waitressing and bartending I make really good money. And it's something I am good at.

Unhappy

I always turn here when I am going through a difficult time. Wish I came here more often to share things that make me happy. I am a control freak, a big one and when I am going through something that I can't control, I lose sight of happiness. This is something I am working on. Going through these feelings again is a lot more difficult than before. I am having a really hard time keeping my chin up. I have envy towards the people who are living their dreams while I am stuck here, paused, and only moving back to my past. The one place I never wanted to be. I am getting a little ahead of myself, it could be nothing. But something is there. What else could it be? This past year I have been nothing but happy. I have finally started feeling pretty again and doing the things I love and the things that make me happy. I was positive that I would never have to experience anything like this again. so it's hard knowing that I might have to. Thanks for reading. Love Always, Kristin

Thanksgiving

I remember last year I was going through one of the hardest things in my life.. I was sick, losing my hair, and didn't have an appetite. But this thanksgiving I am healthy and I can't even describe how happy I am. My hair is getting so long and in no time it will be exactly the length I will be happy with.
I am doing amazing. I am feeling really good and exercising everyday. It's become more and more of an addiction. Hopefully soon I can get to where I want to be. It's been sort of a struggling eating healthy but I am doing better than before.
I've been wanting to take some time and talk about how thankful and blessed I truly am. I've been really selfish lately. I have been looking more into the things that I want rather than looking at everything that I am blessed with. With the holidays close I am becoming more aware of how blessed I am.
A few things I am thankful for..
My number 1 is Danny. I am so in love with this man, I still think its crazy. I am not quite sure how I got so lucky but I can honestly say that we are together for a reason, a really great one. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with him.
My Babies, it's silly but I love all my pets so much. They are the sweetest most precious things I have. And at times I like them more than people. They are so selfless and they love you no matter what. All they need is loyalty.
My family, we have our ups and downs but they are always there for me no matter what and I don't know what I would do without them. I love them so much.
My friends, the few that I have I can say that there is a reason for that. They are the most amazing people I have met. I have the best memories with them.
Last but not least I am SO thankful for my healthy body. I have been cancer free for 7 months and I couldn't be happier. It's made me into who I am today and I am thankful for that. All I can hope for now is to keep staying on the path I'm going on. I want nothing more than to be healthy.

Love Always, Kristin

One year

Today for some odd reason I felt like blogging. Lately it hasn't been something I've been needing or even wanting to do. I honestly don't even know how to blog anymore. I haven't been very open with the emotions I have been feeling, and I am not sure why. Maybe I am trying not to face them. I've been putting on a front and acting like everything is okay.
A year ago yesterday I found out I had Hodgkin's Lymphoma. It's a day I will never forget as much as I would like too. This year has flown by. Today I am happy and healthy. My hair is coming back curly which is crazy because it was so straight before. I am feeling great. One thing I think is really crazy is that half of this year was a complete blur. Going through chemotherapy is something I hardly remember. I chose to forget about it and never go back to that situation to feel the pain I was in then. My mind has done a terrific job forgetting about it totally. I am so happy for that.
I haven't been very thankful for everything I have and how truly lucky I am. I am working on trying to be a better person for myself and everyone I am close with. Sometimes I take things for granted. I want to start  appreciating the things that I have rather than wishing or hoping for more. To be honest I am one of the lucky ones. 

Means a lot..

"i never talked to you, in my life. saw you around at school a few times. but sometimes, when i feel low, i read your blog.
not only do your words make me feel grateful for what i do have, but i think you are a beautiful, incredibly strong young woman, and you inspire me.

keep going strong, xo."


Thanks Steph. This made my day. (:


On another note.. I rarely get on blogger anymore.. Sad I know. 
I recently have gotten into Tumblr. Check it out.