Ask. Believe. Receive.

Yesterday I met with Dr. Varela, who is my surgeon. He wanted to take a look at how my scars were healing. He said that everything was looking really good. The next time I will see him is when my portacath is ready to come out.

Next I met with a girl named Megan. She is the patient navigator for the American Cancer Society. To me it looks like she has such a fun interesting job. I walk in and meet her, she is so cute and friendly. She hands me this gift basket with a blanket, water bottle, candy, tooth brush, toothpaste, and a book. She tells me that all this stuff was donated. Almost right then and there I lost it. I couldn't help but think how selfish I am. Here is this adorable little gift basket from someone I don't know. That basket made me so happy. Here I am worry about a new case for my phone that is freaking $30. When I could be donating or buying something for someone who deserves it. I will never forget how that made me feel and how much it changed my life. I never would of thought to donate to the American Cancer Society. I know I am only human. But I can't help and think that this is why I am going through something like this. Day by day it is opening my eyes to so many great things. I was telling this to my dad, about how grateful I was for that and he replied, "remember all those Christmas' I told you guys we were just going to donate all the money for Christmas that we have and you and your sister threw a fit.." I told him, "Your totally right. How selfish of me." I cannot wait until my journey is over and I am financially stable again so I can donate as much as I can. After she gave me that gift basket we tried on some wigs. And after trying on a bunch I finally found my favorite one! I will post some pictures soon of it. It's really similar to how my hair is cut now. Short and simple is what I wanted. She also let me pick out a few cute scarves. They are adorable. She showed me a bunch of ways I can tie them and wear them. She was so much help. Here I am getting all this stuff for free. (even my wig was free) and I know how expensive they are. I just feel so grateful. And loved. God bless all those people that made it possible for me to have all these things. I am so happy.

Alright, now to my favorite part.. Chemotherapy! I love Dr. Hansen and all his nurses. Everyone is so sweet and if it wasn't for them I am not sure I would be able to go into that office happy. I get my chemo in this room with all the other patients that are there for the same reason. I am going to describe it as like a little party. A little gathering. I absolutely love it. I kinda wish I had to go everyday! There is no one there my age everyone is at least 50+ and I think that is what I love about it most. I love old people, listening to all their stories about hunting and the careers they used to have. They just about talk your ear off. I was sitting in my comfy chair waiting for the nurse to come hook me up, when an old man came in and sat to the chair next to me, he said, "You're way too young to be in here" It kinda made me smile. There was this other old man that just thought my mom was gorgeous, which she is. It was so cute! It makes me happy that I am not the only one going through this at the time. But it also breaks my heart because every one of those chairs was taken up and there were people waiting in the lobby for seats to become available. And this is just at one hospital. I can't believe how many people have cancer. It breaks my heart. I can't stand of the thought. I love being in there because I feel safe and taken care of. I love seeing all the cute old lady's wigs and how they give me advice and I love listening to their stories. I forgot to mention that my chemo takes about 2-3 hours. So I am there for quite some time. Your family and friends are allowed to come in and stay with you. They have candy and this sweet lady yesterday brought in cookies. Sorry I keep rambling. It is just something about all those people that I have a connection to. I love them and wish them the best.

I am so thankful for everything I have been given. I feel so lucky to be where I am at. There is no other part of life I'd rather be living. I am so thankful for everyone that has donated money into my Cancer fund. Thank you, thank you! I am truly blessed.

Xoxox