Roughly a month ago I had my pet scan. You know the one that showed the terrific news about my cancer cells shrinking. Well there was something else that showed up on that scan as well.. I've been told it's "not that big of a deal" and "not to worry about it".. but hello, I am miss anxiety! How can I not. The reason I am even blogging about this is because lately it's been a concern of mine. They found a cyst on my left ovary and lately it's been giving me a lot of pain. This is something I brought up with Dr. Hansen as soon as I found out. He told me that once chemotherapy is over we will look more into it, unless it is giving me pain now, which at the time I was having little pain and always wondered what it was and now it makes total sense. Well now that it is giving me more frequent pain I am thinking I should tell him so he can tell me what he thinks we should do. I hate being the paranoid patient but why shouldn't I be. I want my body as healthy as possible. Like I said it's probably nothing but I worry, back to I worry about having children. I feel like sometimes life is giving me every doubt that I will not be able to get pregnant. This has a lot to do with my anxiety. I am a firm believer in thoughts become things so I hate thinking negative things but honestly I can't help it. I've tried. I've thought about this all day and it hasn't left my mind. Now that I am blogging about it I'm hoping it will leave my mind so I can actually take a break and get some rest. I can't wait to talk to Dr. Hansen for some advice on what the hell is going on in my body. Like I said, he always eases my mind.
Reading this makes me worry about you. Whatever the outcome of it is I know you'll pull through it. Your strength is endless. Never feel as though you cant share your thoughts on YOUR blog. Even if they are negative remember it is YOUR place for YOU. And to be honest, it only shows you are human. I think it is a healthy way of coping. You are doing amazing Kristin! Keep up the good work!
ReplyDelete